Betrayal Trauma

8 questions

What is 'betrayal trauma' and do I have it?

Betrayal trauma occurs when someone you depend on for safety and trust—like your spouse—violates that trust through infidelity or deception. It's not ...

Why do I feel like I'm going to die?

What you're experiencing is real and terrifying - [betrayal trauma](/answers/after-the-affair/what-is-betrayal-trauma-and-do-i-have-it) literally hija...

What's happening to my nervous system right now?

Your nervous system is in complete survival mode right now. When you discovered his betrayal, your brain immediately activated its threat detection sy...

Why am I having intrusive thoughts/images?

Intrusive thoughts and images after betrayal are your brain's way of trying to process trauma. When you discover infidelity or another significant bet...

Is this PTSD?

Yes, what you're experiencing likely shares many characteristics with PTSD. Betrayal trauma from infidelity can trigger the same neurological response...

Why can't I stop obsessing over details?

Your obsession with details is a normal [trauma response](/answers/after-the-affair/why-am-i-numb-one-moment-and-raging-the-next) - your brain is tryi...

What is 'hypervigilance' and why am I doing it?

Hypervigilance is your brain's [protective response](/answers/separation-and-space/is-her-shutdown-protective-or-permanent) to betrayal trauma. It's t...

How do I function when my body won't calm down?

When [betrayal trauma](/answers/after-the-affair/what-is-betrayal-trauma-and-do-i-have-it) hits, your nervous system goes into survival mode, creating...