Attachment History

What attachment style did I develop in childhood?

Your [childhood attachment](/answers/becoming-the-man/what-did-i-learn-about-love-from-my-parents) style was formed through your earliest relationship...

What is 'earned secure' vs. 'earned insecure'?

Your attachment style isn't set in stone from childhood. 'Earned secure' means you've developed [healthy relationship patterns](/answers/fighting-for-...

What attachment injuries did I experience?

Attachment injuries are wounds from early relationships that shaped how you connect with others today. These typically occur when primary caregivers w...

How do childhood attachment wounds show up in marriage?

Childhood attachment wounds create predictable patterns in marriage that often sabotage intimacy. If you experienced inconsistent caregiving, abandonm...

What is 'internal working model' and how do I change mine?

Your internal working model is the unconscious blueprint you formed in childhood about how relationships work—what to expect from others and how lovea...

What did I learn about love from my parents?

Your parents were your first teachers about love, intimacy, and relationships. Whether they demonstrated healthy connection or struggled with conflict...

What didn't I receive that I'm still looking for?

You're likely looking for the foundational needs every child deserves: unconditional love, safety, validation, and consistent [emotional attunement](/...

Can adult attachment patterns change?

Yes, adult attachment patterns absolutely can change, but it requires intentional work and often significant time. Your early attachment experiences c...