Why do I feel physically sick?

Your body is telling the truth about what happened to you. The physical symptoms you're experiencing - whether it's nausea that won't quit, food that tastes like cardboard, exhaustion that sleep doesn't fix, or that constant knot in your stomach - these aren't signs of weakness. They're evidence of trauma.

Betrayal trauma specifically targets your attachment system, the neurological network responsible for bonding and safety. When the person who should be your safe harbor becomes the source of danger, your entire nervous system goes into overdrive. Your vagus nerve, which controls your body's rest-and-digest functions, essentially shuts down. This is why eating feels impossible and why your stomach churns constantly.

The stress hormone cocktail flooding your system - cortisol, adrenaline, and norepinephrine - creates a cascade of physical effects. Your heart races even when you're sitting still. Your muscles stay tense, ready to fight or flee. Your immune system takes a hit, making you more susceptible to illness. Sleep becomes elusive because your brain refuses to power down when it perceives ongoing threat.

This is compounded by hypervigilance - your nervous system scanning constantly for more betrayal, more lies, more evidence of danger. Every text notification, every late night, every unexplained absence sends fresh waves of stress hormones through your body. You're essentially living in a state of chronic activation, and your body is paying the price.

Understand this: your physical response validates the severity of what you've experienced. Betrayal isn't just an emotional wound - it's a full-system trauma that affects every aspect of your being.

Scripture acknowledges the deep connection between emotional pain and physical suffering. 'A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones' (Proverbs 17:22). Your crushed spirit is manifesting in your physical body, and God sees this connection.

David's psalms reveal the physical impact of betrayal and distress: 'My bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy on me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer' (Psalm 32:3-4). Like David, your body is bearing the weight of trauma.

'Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up' (Proverbs 12:25). The anxiety of betrayal - the constant state of hypervigilance and fear - literally weighs on your physical being. God designed us as integrated beings where emotional wounds affect our entire system.

Jesus himself experienced physical symptoms of emotional distress. In Gethsemane, 'his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground' (Luke 22:44), demonstrating that even the Son of God experienced the physical manifestations of extreme emotional stress.

'Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest' (Matthew 11:28). Christ offers rest not just for your soul, but for your weary, trauma-affected body. 'He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds' (Psalm 147:3) - wounds that are both emotional and physical.

God created you as a whole person - body, soul, and spirit intricately connected. Your physical symptoms aren't a sign of weak faith; they're evidence of the comprehensive nature of betrayal trauma and God's design for integrated healing.